trauma

Aliens (short story)

Prose

One day, Amelia woke up in the company of aliens from another planet.

She had no memories of her life before she started living with aliens.

Their language sounded like English aurally, but they couldn’t communicate since they were creatures from different worlds.

Even though they lived in the same spaceship, they lived in a completely different state of existence than Amelia.

They were all the same kind of alien. Amelia was the only human on the spaceship.

Did they perhaps think she was one of them?

She decided to blend in.

She learned to eat alien food.

She played with alien toys.

But secretly, she longed to be rescued by her own kind. She often gazed outside of her bedroom porthole, hoping for a glimpse of Earth. But she didn’t even know what she would do if she saw it.

Convince her alien captors to return her to her planet?

What if she blows her cover and they turn violent?

Should she chance it?

She knew she couldn’t stay, but even after living among the aliens, she couldn’t trust them. She decided to escape on her own.

She made her preparations, and when the chance presented itself, she took it.

She slipped away when the aliens were sleeping, and tucked herself and her bag comfortably into an escape hatch. She powered it up, took aim, and ZOOMED toward freedom!

At first, there was nothing but inky blackness. The vacuum of space was lonely, oppressive, and dangerous. It was a different feeling from when she lived with the aliens.

She pushed aside her feelings of fear, and kept her eyes moving back and forth, searching the darkness. Finally, she saw it!

A glittering blue ball with swirling milky clouds. Her home planet.

When she landed, she was embraced by members of her own kind. Fellow humans. Amelia wept with gratitude. She wasn’t sure this day would ever come.

It took some adjusting, but with the love, care, and patience of other earthlings, Amelia learned to live as a human again.

Sometimes she thought about the aliens, but she never wanted to live with them again.

Amelia lived out the rest of her days as a human on Earth with peace in her heart. Her memory lives on in those she impacted along the way.

PTSD (poem)

Poetry

Experienced death but inexplicably living,

Pandora’s horrors felt all at once.

Masked delusions for protection absent,

No rosy lenses to watch film noir.

Body betrays you and invites in demons,

Terror sweats from every pore.

Pain and agony in every nerve fiber,

Proof of life is absence of death’s peace.

War cries and weapons waging,

Survival close to a sword’s edge.

Become dangerous or be killed by others,

Enemies cloaked in innocuous disguises.

Taming every system in revolt,

Untangle wires looking like hay.

Bang pushed to the end of the universe,

Come home to live in the self we created.

Waves (poem)

Poetry

Waves of depression break,

At the shores of my conscious awareness.

Oceanic mysteries drift,

Carried along by currents.

Flooding a desert reveals,

Sentiment’s intrinsic value.

Formerly disciplined by absence,

Returned to feel its presence.

Acute pain with decay,

Left to rot and fester.

Breathe in and choke on sunshine,

Learn to radiate like the stars.

Push it out and pull it in,

Cosmic light pulsing brightly.

Darkness swallowing the universe,

Become a beacon riding the waves.

Adventurer (poem)

Poetry

Heart like a clam shell,
Bivalve clasped tight from hurt.
Calmer waters awaiting,
Pried apart by loneliness.

Yielding to his touch,
Entwined bodies making waves.
Soft insides willingly exposed,
Global oceans to explore.

United in love,
Connect pain and gain.
Carry home in the heart,
Ring rest on my breast.

Fears extinguished,
Lives stretching to infinity.
Symbiotic linkage,
Defying existence.

Twin (poem)

Poetry

My twin star won’t guide me home,
Rotational energy throws us off-balance.
Stolen glances in a crowd betray interest,
But the bustling movement pulls us away.

Crushed with the burden of being the only,
Knowing you exist is enough to soothe me.
Soften my shell on a boulder in a forest,
Reluctant kisses leave shadows on my lips.

Sharing a mind and all its illnesses,
Amplify our energy beyond its threshold.
Unravel each other’s hurts like bandages,
Scarred and wounded bodies to inspect.

Stars paired with planets,
Split the galaxy into territories.
Radio waves pick up signals,
But my gravity won’t be distorted.

Paradox (poem)

Poetry

Living in a world where everything is fine,

Know me and contradict what’s known.

End the paradox by choosing a reality,

Then shut me out as incompatible in it.

Windows to others constantly closing,

They know you until they don’t anymore.

Persist in darkness, friendless and alone,

Everyone tells me I don’t exist though.

Forgotten as soon as they meet me,

To know me is to reject me.

Yet I still long for love’s gazes to touch me,

Understanding me without leaving me.

People like me aren’t deserving of care,

Even though we needed it the most.

Too abused for anything but neglect,

An unpleasant reminder of evil.

Virgin (poem)

Poetry

Anticipation sends shivers,
Fated moment has arrived.
Foreign feelings to consider,
Hoping it wasn’t lies.

Uncertain of progression,
Waiting for a sign.
Impressionable susceptibility,
Playbook getting written.

Blanks beg to be filled,
Information awaiting.
Answered questions to share,
Or buried deep as a secret.

Kiss and don’t tell,
Be gentle in the night.
Set the tone for forever,
In a moment’s burning light.

Farewell (poem)

Poetry

Maybe at death we will meet again,

When nothing remains but our souls.

Maybe you never really loved me at all,

But everything from me rang true.

The caravan is leaving now,

We’re all packed and moving along.

The road ahead is dark and winding,

Destination to foreign lands inviting.

Maybe we gave each other reason to live,

After that our connection extinguished.

Transaction complete, order received,

Rate the service then proceed.

I can’t stop loving you even though,

I don’t think I ever really knew you.

The truth eludes me when it comes to you,

But I know I meant it, my love was true.

Vacuum (poem)

Poetry

Incessant thoughts wonder whether,

You sought me out for love,

Or simply to turn the tables.

When you left me abruptly,

Was I spared by providence,

Rescued by a spark of moral conscience?

Did you ever intend to return,

To rectify the hate you left behind,

Or have you abandoned the farce?

Duplicitous faces blur together,

Habits of deception all around,

Can’t tell which is real.

Heavy in my belly,

Giving birth to sadness and despair,

Twins to warm me in the absence of a star.

Despair (poem)

Poetry

Something instead of nothing,
Cursed instead of peaceful.
Thoughts of death comfort,
Quelling the turmoil as temporary.

Punished into existence,
Punching bag for the powerful.
Honor what’s been given without request,
Kiss the hand that beats you.

Can’t reach the gods to kill them,
Forbidden fruit of vengeance.
Scream loud enough so they hear,
I never asked for any of this.